Autumn Confidences

The leaves fall, one by one.
Twirling, floating to the ground.
Until they form a big red heap,
Upon which you fitfully sleep.

The well-used window seat
Where i used to sit and gaze
At the place where sea and sky meet,
Now has me in a daze.

The leaves fall on your face,
And you reach to brush them away.
There's naught I can do but encase
What's left of a memory, each ray.

That seat is now dusty,
But i wipe it down.
And take my place, expertly,
Like a king and his crown.

And then, I look at the heap,
Watching as you flawlessly keep,
A straight face, but hard as you try,
I know what goes on behind the lie.

Gone are the days when i would run,
Out from that seat, to enjoy the fun.
Gone are the days when you would leap,
Up at once, my company to keep.

Hard as I deny, I know for sure,
That you and I can never tour,
Those memories again, without feeling
The gnawing pain of a permanant sealing.

All I can do is to hope against hope
That we will, once more, be able to rope
Our confidences in each other,
There can never be another.

i know your angry, but what would you have me do?